This is directed mostly towards anyone that knows me personally, which is, last time i checked, anyone who reads this site - it's not like i have a broad readership.

I've been trying to figure out why i'm so short-tempered of late. This isn't a new thing, but i kind of had it brought home to me how serious it was just this morning. I've been snappy, touchy, and generally suspicious of the motivations of someone whom i should be implicitly trustful of, and it's not fair to her. So, now i want to figure out why.

It's shitty being asked by the one you love why you "hate her all the time" - it kind of brings it into focus, where before i was seeing only my side of the story. I haven't been there for Char the way i should have been, and i think that's a big part of the problem now. i know that i'm a bit of a recluse - my favourite place is right where i am - sitting in front of my computers. What i have to adjust to is that there's now a better use of my time, and treat her accordingly.

So why am i so damn touchy? You people all know me... Help me out. I think i need some advice on this score before i do irreparable damage to the best thing i have in my life. If this is more serious than i'd thought, i may owe more than one person an apology.

I'm sick of being an asshole. I'd really rather stop.

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